Pilgrims and Cafeterias

Last Friday I grabbed my bag, locked my office door, and said goodbye to a studio full of clients working out.  I got in my car and headed to Aleck and Emma Grace’s school.  On my way to eat Thanksgiving meal with them in the cafeteria, I turned on the news.  The interstate seemed busy and I prayed I wouldn’t be late to the feast.  There never seems to be enough time…to be on time…ever.  I turned the radio on and scanned to a news channel.  As I approached the school, a story came on about the “controversial” Black Friday.  The story summed up Wal Mart and Target employees’ unhappiness and frustration with store policy of starting Black Friday on Thanksgiving Day.  I turned my car off, hopped out, and headed into the school.  The entrance was becoming crowded as parents signed in, paid for the meal, and received a meal ticket.  We made our way to the entrance of the cafeteria and waited for our children to come down the hall from their classroom.  The scene reminded me of a mob of paparazzi waiting for celebrities to strut down the red carpet.  I was alone because Amy was teaching.  I stood silently like you’re supposed to do in an elementary school hallway(I remember the rules), waited, and listened to the conversations going on around me.  I mostly heard about kids being sick, breaking limbs(even saw a cellphone pic of a boys s-shaped broken arm), and stress about family coming together for Thanksgiving.  Then to my left I heard a group talking sarcastically about how they couldn’t wait to eat the school food.  “Cardboard turkey, mashed notebook paper, and motor oil gravy…mmm mmmm good…Can’t wait!”, said one Father.  As the parents laughed at the food joke, the first single filed line of waving children made its way through the cafeteria door.  The parents followed, spilling into the room like ants heading to a picnic.  I searched the edges of the room where the children lined up.  I saw Emma Grace first and she broke out of line, sprinted to me, and jumped up into my arms.  I saw Aleck next as he slowly walked over giving me a “What’s up?” head nod.  We made our way through the lunch line and back out into the busy sitting area.  I picked an open table near the trash cans and the tray drop-off.  It was a round table allowing us to sit comfortably next to each other.  As we started eating, I began to ask questions and received head nods for answers. “Why are you guys not talking to me?”, I asked.  Just then a little girl and her parents approached our table.  As the Father started to pull a chair out the girl  said, ” Nooooo Daddy.  This is a silent lunch table!  It’s for kids in trouble.”  I looked at Aleck and asked him if it was true and he just shrugged his shoulders, looked around the room, and said, “I don’t know.  I think so.  It’s ok Dad.”  So we ate…discussing very little and then it was time to go.  I was able to catch Emma Grace’s class poem then dart across to Aleck’s classroom just in time to hear his poem before I left.  On the drive back to the gym I turned my radio back on and immediately heard the reloop of the news story about Target, Wal Mart, and Black Friday.  This time I didn’t get frustrated listening to it.  Instead, I started to think about the lunch I ate and the poems I heard which led to this week’s Blog message :

                                                                              

We all know the Thanksgiving story.  We learned the story of 50 surviving Pilgrims gathering with 90 or so Native Americans celebrating a bountiful harvest.  The story has been taught to us in school and has been a defining piece of America.  Thanksgiving became a day to gather, eat, drink, and give thanks for the blessings bestowed upon us.  Our Country should be very grateful for who we are and what we have.  The first Thanksgiving is important because it was about truly being thankful.  I saw this quote which says it best :

 “The Pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts.  No Americans have been more impoverished than these who, nevertheless, set aside a day of Thanksgiving.” – H. U. Westermayer

This quote should change our perspective.  If it doesn’t, let me help with a few examples.  How have we become a nation of people who can make fun of a meal we didn’t have to grow, kill, prepare, or cook… a meal we’re about to eat with our children…in a safe and loving school?  I know it was just a joke, but having read what Thanksgiving meant to the Pilgrims who suffered such hardship, doesn’t it seem absurd?  We have more food in one convenience store than some countries have in an entire town or village.  Doesn’t it seem we have forgotten the meaning of Thanksgiving when a store can announce it “must” open on Thanksgiving Day to provide sales and deals on things Americans “must have”(and will go out and stand in line to get)….on Thanksgiving Day!?  Thanksgiving has been turned into a day of “getting more”.  It has become a day of over-eating, over-drinking, and shopping.  It seems to me, we over do everything in America instead of having and giving thanks any of it exists at all.  Here’s the thing : If we aren’t thankful… we own nothing.  If you’re sitting in a warm house right now…if you have a job…if you can come and go as you please because you have a car…if your children are safe…if you have food…if you aren’t being bombed or shot at…if you are breathing…and you aren’t thankful…you have nothing.  Without awareness, gratitude, and thankfulness you really have nothing.  Do you want to know how to have everything in your life?  Be thankful…for every thing…every day…every moment…every breath.  There are so many things I’m thankful for in my life, but let me tell you about just one day.  I am thankful for God and His Grace.  I am thankful for my clients who let me sneak out to eat with my children.  I am thankful I can trust they will take care of our gym and each other in my absence.  I am so thankful for the Thanksgiving meal I ate with my Twins.  I am thankful for the cafeteria workers who prepared and served our food.  I am thankful that a little girl who weighed 1 pound when she was born can now run and jump up into my arms.  I am thankful that a little boy who fit in my hand and couldn’t breathe on his own when he was born is willing and happy to sit at a silent lunch table with his Dad.  Even though he thought we couldn’t talk, he was happy to be with me.  I am thankful for Amy and Ella who couldn’t sit at the silent lunch table with us that day(although Ella would have quickly redefined “silent” I’m sure).  I am thankful for  teachers and the love they have for my children.  I am thankful for their Principal.  I am thankful for you.  I am thankful you read my words and share them.  It is truly a blessing.  And I only have one more thing to say about Black Friday(Yes…I have a wife who loves Black Friday and thinks it’s a good idea to wake up at 4am…go stand in the cold…and save 25 cents on a musical toaster…or $1 on a furry glove/ice scraper…or $2 on a label maker)….If you’re thinking of going shopping on Thanksgiving Day…don’t do it.  It’s one day.  Give one day.  Be Thankful!  On Thanksgiving Day think about the words in the following quote 🙂

“For, after all, put it as we may to ourselves, we are all of us from birth to death guests at a table which we did not spread.  The sun, the earth, love, friends, our very breath are parts of the banquet…shall we think of the day as a chance to come nearer to our Host, and to find out something of Him who has fed us so long?” – Rebecca Harding Davis                      

4 thoughts on “Pilgrims and Cafeterias

  1. Ellen says:

    If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “Thank You”, that would suffice.
    Meister Eckhart

  2. Stephanie Chittick says:

    I have never met you but your words brought tears to my eyes and a consciousness to my heart I haven’t had in a very long time. I am grateful to you and so very thankful to be reminded to be ever mindful of the small gifts we bring ourselves and others with our gratitude. Thank you Betsy for plugging me in to this blog. Its a blessing!
    Mindfully Thankful,
    Stephanie

  3. Ellen says:

    And another thought- a lot of junk is bought on black Friday, that is trashed within the year and ends up in the land fill…we are such a consumer driven, disposable society… the cheaper the more disposable and not just flimsy and disposable but in our minds “things” are disposable… a visious cycle…. buy, get rid of, buy, get rid of… it seems very wasteful…

  4. kristi says:

    Such beautiful and insightful observations, Anthony…thank you for sharing!!

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