The Pothole…

One day last week I was able to leave the gym earlier than normal.  It sounds great, but it actually put me in the middle of rush hour traffic(well…rush hour for Asheville…which I know doesn’t even begin to compare to what some of you go through in Atlanta, Charlotte, or any other big city you may be living in right now).  I was heading home on Interstate 26 driving over the bridge before merging onto Interstate 40.  This bridge abruptly goes from two lanes to one and as a result is often the scene of an accident.  I had already escaped no less than two accidents at this point and had noticed how aggressive and downright mean people are to each other during this busy commute time.  I had forgotten because I have worked late for so many years, but this was not fun…or safe.  On the bridge I slowed allowing another person to merge into my lane(with a tractor-trailer riding my bumper and honking at me).  It was either that or let him run out of a lane and force him off the road.  Just as he pulled in front of me I looked in my rearview mirror to see the trucker about an inch from my back bumper.  Exactly when I returned my eyes to the road in front of me, a pothole appeared and I hit it.  It made such a bone chilling noise and jolted my body so hard, I was sure my front wheel was gone.  I just knew I was driving a three-wheeled jeep and was about to be flattened by the big rig behind me.  Instead, to my surprise, I was able to keep driving and nothing appeared to be wrong with my car.  As my heartbeat began to slow, the nauseous feeling subsided, and traffic began to thin, I thought about the pothole I just hit.  It wasn’t there yesterday.  There weren’t any warning signs…no chunks of concrete…no gravel…just a big stinking hole.  How does a hole so suddenly end up in the middle of the road?  And where is all the displaced concrete?  I started researching potholes as a result of these two questions.  Of course cars and trucks weaken the concrete, but it seems the real devil in pothole creation is moisture.  Combined with chemicals and temperature changes, the moisture weakens the concrete from within.  And of course, I found a simple wonderful lesson in this experience.  I would like to share it with you.  I know what you’re probably thinking…another “pothole in the road of life” lesson.  There are great well-known “pothole life lessons”.  For example : Avoid the potholes on the road you’re travelling in life…or : Make sure you are skilled with “anti-pothole maneuvers” in your journey…Swerve around the potholes that may bring you down…or : Patch your potholes to make your trip better…or finally : Choose a different road.  Great lessons….but I don’t want to talk about any of those because my obsession became…Where in the world is the displaced concrete?  How can a hole appear and we don’t see the concrete, gravel, or rocks that once filled it?  It just disappears…is that right?  Further research explains : The material gets broken loose…it gets crushed….or thrown to the side of the road by tires…it gets blown away…it gets washed away.  So what’s the lesson?  BE KIND…BE KIND…just please…BE KIND.  What?  Why?  I bet you’re wondering how this makes sense…Follow me:

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We all have potholes right?  We get beat up by life…we get ran over…stuff happens to us that absolutely…leaves holes in us…potholes all in us…in our minds…our hearts…our souls.  Now let me ask you…what happens to potholes?  They get patched right?  This is important :  Just because you don’t see the broken concrete, rocks, gravel in a pothole…just because you don’t see the pain, recovery, tragedy, darkness, and sadness in a person…doesn’t mean it isn’t there.  It didn’t just disappear…it may have been overcome…crushed deeper into their soul…blown over…washed away…or patched…but it did not disappear.  So…BE KIND.  How can we be kind?  Just as you drive to avoid potholes, drive your thinking in a way that makes you a kind person.  Use your own “stuff” to inspire empathy and compassion you can share with others.  Many times people only need a kind and special hearted person to LISTEN to them…you will be surprised at how it can change their world.  Make a kind phone call.  Send a kind e-mail.  Let someone merge into your lane(watch for big potholes and crazy truck drivers though).  As much as you can’t stand a person…ask yourself “What kindness can I do for him/her?”   I once read : “Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something.”  How true is that saying?  BE KIND…BE KIND… because we all have…or have had potholes in our lives.  They may be new, old, or even patched…but kindness can only help make them a little smoother…and sometimes we’re put in people’s lives to do that…and thankfully people are put into our lives for the same reason.  So let’s do a little roadwork this week…  Mother Teresa said it perfectly : “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier.  Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.”   🙂

Big shout out to my girls for riding with me on the pothole picture hunting mission :

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